


Contest

by Pieceofship



Category: Steven Universe - Fandom
Genre: F/F, Stuffing, use of alcohol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2018-09-17 18:29:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9337604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pieceofship/pseuds/Pieceofship
Summary: Peridot ends up in a pizza eating contest with a drunk Jasper, the gem she's hardcore crushing on.





	

Peridot's brow twitched in annoyance  
as yet another obnoxious pop song played far too loudly for her liking. She was going to have the worst headache in the history of headaches. Whoever made this playlist had no taste! Or maybe Peridot was just too much of a hipster wannabe to like anything fun. So why did she come to this party being held at some rich dude's house? Well for starters, free food and booze. And then there was her.

Her name was Jasper, a quartz from the beta kindergarten. She was just her type, bold, tall, daring, and not afraid to speak her mind. Currently swinging her hips to the beat of the song and singing along in a tipsy manner with a beer can in one hand. And where was she? In the corner of the room, either watching Ruby and Sapphire suck face or mooching off the wifi with her phone.

"Come on Peridork, go talk to her!" her best friend Lapis Lazuli urged, making her way over to Peridot. 

Aw fuck, not this against.

"I...I have a headache." Well, more like getting one.

"You wuss." Lapis shook her head and sipped her can of beer. 

"Ease up on the booze, you're my ride home." Peridot frowned and watched Lapis chugged the rest just to spite her and let out a loud belch.

"Whatever, once the pizza arrives and we get a few slices we're call it a night... If I'm sober enough to drive." she added with a smirk.

"You piece of shit..." Peridot grumbled as Lapis smirked, going over to join Pearl and Greg, who were both doing body shots off Rose Quartz.

Great, now she probably had to spend the night with a bunch of drunken shit heads... Though at least this way she could prevent any creeps from trying to take advantage of Jasper should she get too drunk. But stars, the party crowd wasn't for her. She preferred the company of her laptop, books, and phone. She sighed and tucked her phone away, if she was stuck here for the whole night she should try to save her phone's battery. At least she would get some pizza out of this, she didn't get to eat breakfast since Lapis burned it, and had a late lunch consisting of a ham and cheese sandwich, with a side of salt and vinegar chips, and a diet cola. So some pizza would definitely make this night less terrible. And she got to see Jasper, that was a small plus. But damn that quartz could drink like it was the end of the world. And the more she drank, the more she danced and slurred along to songs.

Maybe Lapis was right? Maybe she should just go up and try to chat her up a bit. How hard could it be? Jasper had a few beers in her, so maybe she wouldn't be judgemental on her lack of conversational skills. It might be worth a-

"PIZZA'S HERE!" Amethyst declared, her and Jamie carrying dozens of boxes inside.

Right after some pizza! What? You can't converse with someone on an empty stomach. She made her way through the crowd and grabbed a slice of cheese pizza and gobbled it up. Stars, finally some joy out of this blasted party! Everyone knew free food was the best part of any party, no matter how shitty. Peridot grabbed another slice, this time meat lover's pizza and made short work of the slice. She was so damn hungry she could eat a horse! Peridot reached out to grab another slice, this time good old fashioned pepperoni and cheese, but another hand reached for it also, touching Peridot's hand.

It was then Peridot wanted to fling herself into the sun. The other hand belonged to freaking Jasper! Of course! Why must she have such rotten luck? 

"Sup, Pe-Peri?" Jasper slurred, her breath reeking of alcohol.

"Na-nothing much." she stuttered, withdrawing her hand from the pizza slice. "Here, you have it."

Jasper grinned from ear to ear and snatched up the slice, gobbling it down twice as fast as Peridot did. Fuck, Peridot was in love.

"Thanks!" Jasper mused loudly and cheerfully as she wiped the grease off on her arm. Oh how charming.

"No problem." Peridot nodded and was about to get another slice until Jasper grabbed both her hands excitedly. 

"Let's have a p-pizza eating contest!" Jasper announced excitedly, bouncing up and down.

"A-A contest?" Peridot stuttered out.

A contest could only mean one thing, a loud and drunk audience, but it would mean she would have an excuse be close to Jasper. Jasper gave a lopsided grin and picked up as many pizza boxes as she could carry.

"WE'RE HAVING A PIZZA EATING CONTEST!" Jasper announced, the crowd cheered and a few willing and not so willing participants gathered around to take part. "Come on, Peri!" she urged. "It will be fuuuuun!" Well if this was fun, Peridot hated fun. But damn Jasper was cute when she was like this...With a weak sigh she nodded. "Alright! Come on everybody!" she laughed and gave everyone who was willing to do the contest a pizza box of their own.

Peridot gulped nervously as she looked around. So far it was her, Jasper, Greg, Pearl (who gave into peer pressure), Ruby and Rose Quartz taking part in this display.

"Woo, go Ruby!" a tipsy Sapphire cheered.

Well, at least she wasn't making out with her girlfriend anymore. 

"Alright, on the c-count of three, go." Jasper slurred. "One, two, three, g-go!" she yelled.

Peridot and everyone else soon opened the pizza boxes before them. Each box contained a pizza that was six slices, though the variety was varied. Peridot got cheese and pepperoni, Jasper got vegetarian, Pearl got cheese, Ruby got Hawaiian, Rose got meat lovers, and Greg got donair. 

Ruby pouted. "I don't like pineapple on pizza."

"Too bad!" Jasper laughed, picking up a slice and took a large messy bite out of it.

Ruby let out a huff and pushed the box aside before getting up and leaving.

"You did your best, Ruby!" Sapphire reassured as she stumbled to her. The two returned to yet another make out session.

Peridot picked up her slice and took a bite, just as good as the first two slices she ate before this contest. She glance at the other folks doing this. Jasper, Greg, and Rose we're eating their first slice with ease. It was Pearl who was the black sheep out of the bunch. Her face scrunched up in disgust as Pearl picked up a pizza slice as if it were a dead rat.

"Revolting..." Pearl grumbled, sticking her tongue out.

"Come on!" Greg urged through a mouthful. "It tastes great, they ordered from the good place."

"Eating is disgusting." Pearl stated and pushed her box away like a fussy child. 

"You weren't complaining when we were doing body shots off Rose." he reminded, taking another bite of his pizza. 

"That's completely different!" Pearl snapped, her cheeks flaring blue with embarrassment. "I refuse to take part in this disgusting contest." and with a that being said Pearl left.

With Ruby and Pearl out of the contest so early, that only left Jasper, Greg, Rose, and herself. Peridot polished off the first slice of pizza with ease and dug into the second slice. She wished she had time to savour the greasy cheese, perfect cuts of pepperoni, and that tangy tomato sauce with just a hint of spice. But this was a contest, and Peridot always been competitive...Well normally with video games, but she had no plans to lose this. She glanced at the other competitors, she bet Greg would tap out soon as he was a human. Though Peridot wasn't sure about Rose, she seemed to dislike the pizza's crust. And Jasper was too drunk for Peridot to properly come up with a possible outcome.

She felt full, she already gorged down two slices prior to the two she eaten. Not to mention she nibbled on bowls of chips while waiting for the pizza. But she polished off the second piece and moved onto the third. 

"DONE!" 

Peridot felt her heart sank, did she really just lose so quickly?

Rose Quartz beamed in pride, a little pizza sauce on her face. 

"Rose, you gotta eat the crust!" an audience member called, instantly making the gem frown.

"But I only liked stuffed crust..." Rose Quartz whined with a pout. "Without the cheese in the middle it's just dry bread."

In the end Rose Quartz pushed the box away from her and left her spot with a sad frown.

"You did your best!" Greg called, after swallowing a mouthful of pizza. "Good job, Rose!"

Okay, now it was down to Greg, Jasper, and her. Peridot hoped Greg would be out of the contest soon, no way she wanted to lose to a mere human! Even if the full feeling in her tummy begged to differ. Peridot polished off her third slice before starting on her fourth. Much to her horror Greg was a piece ahead of her. How?! He was a darn human!

She immediately tried to force herself to gobble down the slice at a faster pace. So fast it made that full feeling she had get stronger and ache painfully. 

Though it appeared luck was on her side, as soon as Greg was down to his last slice, he pushed his box away, leaving the last slice of pizza untouched.

"Ugh, I can't eat anymore." he groaned. "I'm gonna burst if I do..."

And with that being said he left, leaving just Jasper and Peridot. Both gems looked fit to burst, bellies full and round with greasy pizza. But Jasper seemed to have the advantage, she was too drunk to pay any attention to the aching fullness in her gut like Peridot did. But Peridot refused to let that slow her down. Crush or not, Jasper was going down.

She quickly grabbed the second last slice, taking a large bite and quickly chewing. No way she was going to lose! No one could beat the loveable Peridot! Plus if she won it would give her an excuse to talk to Jasper! She snatched up the final piece and glanced at Jasper, who was on the final piece as well. This was it, they were both on the final piece, neck to neck in this pizza eating contest. Desperate times called for desperate measures! Armed with the last slice of pizza, she shoved the whole slice into her mouth greedily. She awkwardly worked her jaws around the slice and began to chew. She refused to lose, this could be her chance to impress Jasper! Eating more then her would surely impress Jasper! She might even remember it when she sobered up. It was then she finally swallowed.

"DONE!" her and Jasper's voice cried out.

"It's a tie!" a human in the crowd declared.

A tie?! How?! That was impossible, she was suppose to win and impress Jasper by beating her. Now her plan was foiled! 

"I...I want a tie breaker." Jasper slurred with a hiccup.

Peridot couldn't help but blush upon seeing how equally big they're bellies were from the pizza. 

"Tie breaker it is then!" Amethyst laughed and placed another pizza box before the two gems.

Peridot wanted to die. Upon opening the boxes it revealed that instead of being a six slice pizza, it was a twelve slice pizza. Jasper's pizza was a cheese one, while her's was vegetarian. She already ate six slices, not including the two she ate prior to this damn contest. Her eyes darted over to Jasper, who was already digging into her first slice. She needed a plan to outsmart Jasper and win this contest. But how? How could one quickly devour a pizza? Then it hit her.

Her face broke out into a big fat grin as she put her plan into action. Rather then eating the pizza piece by piece, she began to roll the whole pie together into one massive pizza burrito. There, she was a genius! This way she could eat faster then ever! She took a large bite of the rolled up pizza and chewed. Ugh, she felt so full...But victory was so close, all that stood in her way was this odd burrito she created. With that being said she took another bite, and another, and another. Some grease dribbled down her chin as she glance at Jasper, who was only on her third slice. This was it, she was so close to winning!

A few more bites and the pizza burrito was nothing more. 

"Do-done." Peridot panted and leaned back in her seat. She glanced at Jasper, who had only managed to eat half the pizza before Peridot had finished all twelve slices.

A short lived series of hoots and hollers for Peridot's victory filled the room before the crowd ditched them to watch Lapis and Amethyst do keg stands. 

"Con...congrats." Jasper hiccuped, getting from her chair and waddling over to her. "You," she jabbed a finger into Peridot's pizza filled gut. "are hella fucking talented at stuffing your face."

Peridot grinned, oh finally! She impressed her, this was a dream come true!

"Thank you, you are too" Peridot beamed. 

"So....how about a rematch sometime?"


End file.
